Tuesday, November 29, 2016

Who Walks You Down The Aisle

As times continue to change and weddings become more personalised, brides are asking: Who walks me down the aisle? We all know the traditional answer. Look at any wedding ceremony processional guide, and you’ll find the bride is escorted by her father. Today's bride has many more options! For brides with fathers at home, You may decide to share the longstanding tradition with your father. Your Dad will be honoured to give his little girl away to be married to the love of her life. But if “Traditional” is not for you there are plenty of important figures in your life that would be honoured and deserve to be honoured. Who will you choose to walk you down the aisle?


Brides in any circumstance deserve to feel radiant as they walk down the aisle at their weddings As a cornerstone of the ceremony, this walk lets the bride make her wedding day debut special and memorable. Naturally, Las Vegas brides, you want someone with you who will make you feel confident and calm as you take steps to transition into a new phase of life as a married woman. That special person could be your mom or dad.  If your parents are not available to walk you down the aisle for whatever reason, embrace your identity as a modern bride.
Recently, we spoke with several brides to explore what they would recommend, from the classic “father of the bride” walk down the aisle to nontraditional methods for brides who were from non-traditional families. Of course, each bride is different. You have to find what best works for you, your family, and your fiance. But if you aren’t sure where to start, here are a few “walk down the aisle” options:
If your father and mother are married and both are important to you: You love the idea of walking down the aisle with Dad. However, since Mom played a huge role in your life too, you don’t want her to feel like she’s not included or recognised in your wedding. Ask Mom how she wants to be involved. Does she want to walk you down the aisle? She may be completely content letting Dad walk you down the aisle since she’s involved in many separate, important roles in the wedding. But if you both feel that’s not enough, feel free to ask Mom to escort you down the aisle with Dad. With one parent on each arm, you’ll show your guests just how important both your parents are to you.
If you want your father to walk you down the aisle: You’ve always known Dad would walk you down the aisle. Now that special moment is coming quicker than you can imagine, and you can’t wait to share this special moment as father and daughter. When you walk together at your wedding, take small steps to take your time and soak in the moment. Share a few final words with Dad, who raised you, loved you, and is now letting you go for you to become the woman he always hoped you’d be. Even if you don’t remember what was said, you’ll remember the way you felt on your wedding day, arm-in-arm with Dad as he walked you to your groom. These feelings can be the same even if you have two dads or two moms, walk with the parents or person who is most special to you.
If your parents and step parents equally important to you: Your parents are divorced, and both Mom and Dad have been remarried for years. You’ve always considered yourself lucky because you have two father figures--Dad and Step Dad--and both have always treated you like their own kid. Or you may have two mother figures. Since you love them both and want to show them your appreciation, you can ask both sets of parents to be involved in the wedding aisle walk. Have one of them walk you halfway. When you reach  halfway down the aisle, have the other parent(s) walk you the rest of the way and give your hand to your fiance. Also, if you have enough room in the aisle way, you can consider having one "father" figure on each arm the whole way.
If your father has passed away: You love your Dad, and you always envisioned him walking you down the aisle for your wedding day. Even if he isn’t physically present, you can include his memory in the ceremony. Ask your mom, uncle, grandparent, sister or brother. You may consider walking alone since no one can truly fill Dad or Mom's shoes. Just remember it may be beneficial to have someone who loves you and supports you at your side for this big moment on your special day.

If your biological parent wants to walk you down the aisle but your stepparent raised you
: You see your biological parent once a year or so but they did not raise you,  On the other hand, your stepparent has been consistently there for you, and your siblings. You wish your step parent could walk you down the aisle, but your other parent is getting demanding. If he can’t walk you all the way, he won’t come to your wedding. As the bride, you deserve to make the decision of who will walk you, not to have it made for you. If you want both parents to be involved, consider compromises, like having them both walk with you.  However, if you’d regret having your biological father or mother give you away, then you’ll have to talk with them. Calmly explain that you would love to have them in attendance at your wedding. However, you are the bride and you are the one with the right to decide who walks you down the aisle. If you have wholeheartedly chosen only your step parent for your walk, don’t let family drama deter you. Hope for the best, and remember how happy you’ll be when you’re supported on your wedding day walk by the parent who has supported you every day of your life.
If your mother and/or extended family raised you: Dad has never been in the picture. Mom has raised you, and she did a pretty good job, if you do say so yourself. Now that you’re older, she’s become not just a mother, but also a good friend. Honour Mom by asking her to walk with you down the aisle. If you were raised by Mom’s family as a joint effort, consider asking extended family members. If you are close to your grandfather or an uncle, ask him to walk you down the aisle and give your hand to your groom. Don’t forget to think about your brother. If he has always been there for you, he might be honoured to step up and fill these shoes. Whichever family member you choose for the aisle walk, they’ll all be there as guests to support your marriage.
If you are afraid of upsetting too many people by choosing the wrong person: You have no idea who to choose for your aisle walk. In the wake of your parents’ divorce, Mom’s family would take it as a personal affront if you to choose to walk with Dad. You considered asking your best friend who’s had your back since middle school, but he thinks it’s horridly inappropriate. Your brother is volunteering, but you haven’t been close in recent years. Rather than deal with this, you just want to throw your hands in the air and walk by yourself. While this may solve the problem, you don’t want to look back on your wedding with regrets. Talk with your groom, and decide together what would be appropriate and make you happy. Then find a way to make it happen. Easier said than done, we know. See how you can compromise and remind yourself that this is your wedding. While that doesn’t give you power to lord over others, it does give you the right to choose who you want to walk you down the aisle, whether it’s your father or your groom himself.
If you are getting remarried: Dad walked with you once, and he is willing to support you again. If you would like him to escort you down the aisle, then go for it! There’s nothing that says you can’t walk with him just because you haven’t been living under his roof for fifteen years. Enjoy this special moment with Dad. However, if you’ve grown apart from your parents, you’re also allowed to consider your options. If you have a son who’s old enough and mature, ask him if he would like to participate in your new marriage in this way. Either way, make sure that you and the person you’re walking with feels comfortable and proud to be walking down the wedding aisle arm-in-arm.
If you want to walk alone: You’ve been on your own for a long time, and there are no family members who you feel comfortable asking. Also, as an independent bride, you worry that leaning on someone else’ arm as you walk down the aisle shows you’re not self-sufficient. We’re all about beautiful brides with spirit. By carrying yourself to your fiance, you certainly can symbolise your independence as a woman as well as your choice, not anyone else’s decision, to join with your partner in marriage. However, we recommend walking down the aisle with someone not because we doubt what you’re made of. Rather, we know how special it is to have someone with you to share those moments and morally support you as you enter a new stage of life. If you’re walking alone, consider your motives, your family’s wishes, and your happiness with this decision. If you’re walking alone to dodge family drama, then consider compromises and ultimately choose what makes you feel the most happy and supported on your wedding day. However, if you’re confident about going solo and you can gather all the support you need by looking to the end of the aisle where your groom awaits, then step out and strut down that aisle on your own to your future husband. From that moment forward, you’ll never have to walk alone again.
How to Choose: Final Thoughts
As a bride, you can choose whatever you want for your walk down the aisle. Keep your family’s feelings in mind, and do your best to make sure all sides are pleased. But remember this is your wedding day. Don’t compromise your happiness. If family drama arises, don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself. You’re the bride. You deserve to be happy on your wedding day.

When you walk down the aisle at your wedding, walk with someone who loves you and supports your decision to marry your loved one. Enjoy the moment, and take time to absorb the conversation, the emotion, and even your surroundings, from attending guests to decor. Then you’ll feel at ease and at peace for the moment you’ll take your groom’s hand, say your vows, and begin your blessed marriage as a happy couple.

Monday, November 21, 2016

Getting Married

Traditionally, who pays for what?

As a reference, below is a list of the traditional expenses and responsibilities of the bride’s and groom’s families, the bridesmaids and groomsmen, and even the wedding guests. Keep in mind that these days, all of the following guidelines for family expenses are variable—depending on the particular circumstances of the wedding. Often, expenses are shared by the couple and their families, so assign the responsibilities to fit your circumstances.

Traditional Expenses of the Bride and Her Family

  • Services of a wedding consultant
  • Invitations, enclosures, and announcements
  • The bride’s wedding gown and accessories
  • Floral decorations for the ceremony and reception, bridesmaids’ flowers
  • The bride’s bouquet (unless it is customary for the groom to pay for it)
  • Tent, awning, aisle runner
  • Music for church and reception
  • Transportation of bridal party to ceremony and to reception
  • All reception expenses
  • Services of a traffic officer or security, if necessary
  • Photographer, wedding photographs, wedding albums
  • Videographer and finished DVD
  • Transportation and lodging expenses for the officiant if from another town and if invited to officiate by the bride’s family
  • Accommodations for bride’s attendants
  • Bridesmaids’ luncheon, if hosted by the bride or her family
  • Bride’s gifts to her attendants
  • Bride’s gift to groom
  • Groom’s wedding ring

Traditional Expenses of the Groom and His Family

  • Bride’s engagement and wedding rings
  • Groom’s attire
  • Ties and gloves for the groomsmen, if not part of their clothing rental package
  • Accommodations for the groom’s attendants
  • Accommodations for the groom’s parents and siblings
  • Bachelor dinner, if the groom wishes to give one
  • All costs for the rehearsal dinner
  • Officiant’s fee or donation
  • Transportation and lodging expenses for the officiant, if from another town and if invited to officiate by the groom’s family
  • The marriage license
  • Transportation for the groom and best man to the ceremony
  • The bride’s bouquet (when it is local custom for the groom to pay for it)
  • The bride’s going away corsage, if wearing one
  • Boutonnieres for groom’s attendants
  • Corsages for immediate members of both families (unless the bride has included them in her florist’s order)
  • The officiant’s fee or donation
  • Groom’s gift to bride
  • Gifts for groom’s attendants
  • Honeymoon expenses

Maid of Honor’s/Bridesmaids’ Expenses

  • Purchase of apparel and all accessories
  • Transportation to and from the wedding location
  • A contribution to a gift from all the bridesmaids to the bride
  • An individual gift or a group gift from the attendants to the couple (if being in the wedding is not the gift)
  • Optionally, a shower, luncheon, or hens party for the bride

Best Man’s/Groomsmen’s/Ushers’ Expenses

  • Rental or purchase of wedding attire
  • Transportation to and from the wedding location
  • A bachelor dinner, if given by the groom’s attendants
  • A contribution to a gift from all the groomsmen to the groom
  • An individual gift or a group gift from the attendants to the couple (if being in the wedding is not the gift)

Guests’ Expenses


  • Transportation to and from the wedding
  • Lodging expenses and meals
  • Wedding gift

Monday, November 7, 2016

Sri Lankan Wedding


Asham Danoj & Miuru Sibani 





The main ethnic groups in Sri Lanka are the Sinhalese, who make up the majority of the population, Sri Lankan Tamils, Tamils of recent Indian origin, and Muslims. The main religions are Buddhism, Hinduism, Islam, and Christianity. With all these different communities on the island cultural wedding traditions can vary widely but in many interesting cases traditions actually run parallel and overlap.


Buddhism is the most common religion in the island country, and Buddhist Sri Lankan weddings borrow a lot from Hindu traditions.  Things like horoscopes and formal family proposals are equally apart of both traditions though they play out slightly different between them.

Largely marriages in Sri Lanka are arranged or semi-arranged through the community and the match-making services that exist within the various traditions.  Modern weddings are leaning more and more towards love matches, like in the rest of South Asia, but tradition and religion are still paramount to the proceedings.


Before the revival of Buddhism in the 19th century, marriage in Sri Lanka generally followed the Hindu marriage laws of India.  There were strict rules regarding how a woman was allowed to act, and both parties, the bride and groom, had to formally request the consent of their parents before being allowed to marry.  In addition, caste was incredibly important to matching couples.  Buddhism, with its treatment of marriage as a secular rather than ritualistic union, is generally believed to have improved the condition of the Sri Lankan woman and to have created a more gender equal society.

Because Christian, Hindu, and Muslim traditions in Sri Lanka generally align with typical weddings from these communities with only slight variation, in this guide we will be focusing mostly on Buddhist Sinahala and Kanyada wedding traditions and speak only briefly about the above cultures.  Over the course of this wedding guide we will be exploring the lead up to the wedding, the variety of ceremonies that are absolutely key to the marriage, the clothes, the food, and the history of Sri Lankan wedding traditions.